


deflect

by thisissirius



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: First Kiss, M/M, Sparring, Unresolved Issues, trigger - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-14 05:02:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5730427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisissirius/pseuds/thisissirius
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>they both know their limits. </p><p>(or finn and poe spar and it gets a little out of hand).</p>
            </blockquote>





	deflect

**Author's Note:**

> i've been trying to write something for these two dudes for AGES (i even tried writing my dream fic of threesome but NOPE) and the one day i don't try and force it, i write this. nothing much HAPPENS except a kiss. obviously sparring. poe needs to actually talk to someone, i'm not advocating this is the best way to deal with issues. but. 
> 
> i just have a lot of poe dameron feelings, guys.
> 
> (written for this at the kinkmeme: https://tfa-kink.dreamwidth.org/1082.html?thread=992058#cmt992058)
> 
> thank you to hazel and mar, who both read this over for me. i appreciate it, guys <3
> 
>  **warnings;** i've been asked to add a trigger warning for this, but i haven't had clarification yet. for now, i'll say that there's violence; one person allows another to take out their aggression on them.

“You’re getting good at that.”

Finn grins as he hits the punch bag again, flicking a glance over his shoulder. Poe’s leaning against the wall to his left, arms crossed and affable smile in place. It’s not surprising that Poe’s found him, not that he’s trying hard to hide. He doesn't know what it must have been like while he was in Medical, but it's been a little smothering since, not that he doesn't appreciate having someone who cares. Rey’s off with Master Skywalker, and even if he gets why, it still stings to think that she took off without him. After - well, after. “I had a lot of practice.”

Poe’s face doesn’t change, but there’s a shadow in his eyes. Finn says things sometimes, forgets himself, mentions the First Order or being a Stormtrooper or something else that will make that look appear on Poe’s face. He doesn’t do it on purpose, and there’s always a flash of resentment that he should have to. Then he remembers Poe was _tortured_ before Finn rescued him and feels a little guilty. “You want a moving opponent?”

It’s not the first time Poe’s asked, or even the first time they’ve sparred. Still, Finn should say no. He’s spent an hour in therapy, another going through First Order defences with General Organa, and at lunchtime, an idiot in the mess cursed Finn out for _not being Resistance material_. He’s in the gym for a reason, and he knows better than to fight someone when he’s angry. “No.”

There’s a searching look on Poe’s face as he pushes himself away from the wall and circles around Finn. “We could both use it.”

Now that Poe’s in line of sight, Finn can see the pinched look on his face, the exhaustion under his eyes and the way he’s holding himself. It’s been long enough that he likes to think he knows Poe, knows how to read his moods, and right now Poe’s not lying; he _does_ need this. 

Besides, they both know their limits. 

“At least there’s not much of an audience this time,” Finn says, backing up enough on the mat that Poe has room to join him. Last time they’d sparred, the gym had been packed with people fresh off of a battle and they’d drawn a crowd eager to see an ex-Stormtrooper face down the beau of the Resistance. 

Poe flashes a smile that’s all teeth. It’s fake, Finn knows, and something prickles on the back of his neck. Something feels _off_. “I don’t mind.”

“You wouldn’t,” Finn says lightly, trying to ease some of the tension. It doesn’t work. 

They’re evenly matched; where Finn is strong and bulky, Poe is adept at using his reflexes and speed to dodge and duck Finn’s practised blows. Where Poe is trained in hand to hand, Finn’s been conditioned to take hit after hit and stay standing. They’ve also done this a couple of times, know most of the moves the other favours, and it’s getting easier to predict where the hits will land. 

“You _have_ been practising,” Poe says, a little breathlessly, as he darts away from Finn, taking a moment to recover. 

Finn wipes off his brow, unable to keep the grin off of his face. He loves this, the euphoria that comes from fighting someone who knows you so well, who can keep up with you. It helps that Poe doesn’t, and never has, looked at Finn like an ex-something, but someone worth having. “Again?”

Poe doesn’t reply, he just takes a step forward and punches. Finn raises an arm to block, but reels back; there’s more force behind it than he’s expecting. He regains his balance and barely has his footing before Poe’s advancing again, the shadows in his eyes a little stronger, the steel in his gaze making him less the Poe that Finn has come to know. 

“Poe-”

He cuts off as Poe punches again, and this time it lands. Finn hisses out a breath, shoves at Poe with both hands and draws himself to his full height as Poe stumbles away from him. 

Those still in the gym are drifting over, some looking on in concern, some with expressions that Finn can’t read. He thinks, bitterly, that some are probably enjoying this. Finn isn’t; Poe is advancing again, and this time the anger is evident on his face. His eyes are glassy, his expression not all there. Finn knows what this is. He’s seen it on some of the 'troopers, those who saw too much battle, killed too many people. Pent up aggression is one thing, but this is different. This is Poe, someone who’s been tortured and threatened with death, someone who’s been sure he was going to die. This is the fight, the effort of having to be _Poe_ , the worry that he’s not good enough. 

Finn knows because he feels it in himself. “Come on, then.”

Poe takes the challenge, advances and advances and advances, all the while raining blows that Finn just _takes_ because it’s the only thing he can do. The next hit lands on Finn’s cheek and pain flares underneath his eye. He ducks out of the way, kicks out with a leg that trips Poe enough that he stumbles away, giving Finn time to take a breath. His face throbs, there’s a bruise already blossoming on his arm, and Poe’s still coming. 

“Finn-” It’s Jess, pushing her way through the crowd, and she looks at Poe with a mixture of pain and worry. “Should I-”

“No,” Finn says breathlessly, swinging at Poe, who grabs his arm and twists. Finn’s pulled this move himself and he manages to wrench his arm away, swallow down the pain and plant his elbow in Poe’s stomach. 

He holds back as he fights, lets Poe do all the work, knowing that eventually he’ll tire, when there’s nothing left to give. Poe’s not the best pilot in the resistance without reason, though, and he certainly knows how to fight; he’s dirty, throwing punches and digs that Finn doesn’t expect. 

There’s a uniform way that Stormtroopers fight and Finn knows how to react to that. Poe is something different, and some of the blows he lands are because Finn isn’t as good, doesn’t know where or when they’re coming. Poe is reckless in his anger, raining blows that wouldn’t hit if Finn wasn’t holding back, wasn’t letting Poe have this. 

Poe’s eyes flash angrily. He tackles Finn and slams him into the wall he’d been casually leaning against not that long ago. Finn grunts in pain, shoves Poe off of him, but gets only a seconds reprieve before Poe growls and lunges for him again. 

“Finn, _Force_ , he’s going to-”

“It’s fine,” Finn bites out. Poe’s getting sloppy, the tightness in his face easing, and it won’t be long before Finn can pin him down. 

Sure enough, Poe’s next punch lands far short and Finn takes advantage. He wraps his ankle around Poe’s and shoves at the same time, keeping hold of Poe’s shirt so that when he lands, it’s only hard enough to stun, not cause pain. 

“Poe.” Finn keeps a tight grip on Poe, straddles his hips and presses, bearing down with his weight. Poe bucks against him once, twice, before letting out a slow breath. Finn can see the fight physically leave his body and the sound he makes is something close to a sob. 

Finn looks up, finds Jess’ face and begs her without words. She nods once, quick, and with a last look at Poe, she starts ushering people from the gym. Finn drops his gaze back down to Poe. His chest feels tight at the expression he sees on Poe’s face. 

“Finn.” Poe’s voice is hoarse, like he’s been shouting for hours, instead of the dark silence of the last half hour. “I-”

“It’s okay,” Finn says, sliding one hand up to Poe’s neck. He curls his fingers against the back of Poe’s head, soft strands falling between his fingers. They’re sweaty, gross and desperately in need of a good conversation, but Finn can’t find the right words. 

Poe’s chest is heaving, eyes clearing rapidly. His hands find Finn’s waist and his grip is tight. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s _okay_.” Finn leans down a little more, pressing his forehead to Poe’s. Poe closes his eyes, breathing hot onto Finn’s cheek. 

Minutes pass in what feels like hours, but neither of them move. Finn doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do now. He’s never had it be this personal; his chest aches for Poe, and he wants to make it better but he doesn’t know _how_. When he says so, Poe’s eyes snap open. 

“Finn.” He sounds incredulous. Lifting one hand, he brushes Finn’s cheek with his fingers, lets them linger just under Finn’s left eye. There’ll be a spectacular bruise there tomorrow, but Finn doesn’t care. “You don’t even _realise_. You just let me beat the crap out of you.”

Finn shrugs. “You needed it.”

Poe’s gaze softens. It’s finally Finn’s Poe and he can’t help the grin. Poe’s answering smile is small and tentative, but there. “You’re more than I - thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Finn doesn’t want to move, but he’s still effectively pinning Poe to the floor. He shifts his hips, about to pull away when Poe’s grip tightens. Freezing in place, Finn searches Poe’s face, not sure entirely what he’s looking for. “Poe?”

“I didn’t mean to do that,” Poe says, eventually. He licks his lips, looking uncomfortable, but he never pulls his eyes away from Finn’s. 

The moment feels fragile, like it’s going to break if Finn says or does the wrong thing. He brushes his own fingers down Poe’s face, his thumb resting against Poe’s jaw. “I know what it’s like to not be able to - to have so much anger and frustration that you just want to hurt something.”

Poe looks pained. “It shouldn’t have been you.”

“I don’t trust anyone else,” Finn says. 

“ _Finn_.” Poe swallows. 

Time seems to stretch. It’s almost like Finn can hear every heartbeat, can feel every inhale and exhale that Poe takes. It wouldn’t take much to drop down and press his lips to -

Poe surges up and catches Finn’s mouth with his own. It’s hard, rough and fast, like their fight, like _them_. Fingers tightening in Poe’s hair, Finn reacts to the way Poe moves against him. Poe bites and licks and makes noises that drive Finn on, kissing until he doesn’t know how to _stop_. 

When they finally part, Finn blinks quickly at the affection and awe on Poe’s face. He’s not sure anyone’s ever looked at him like that before, not even Rey. He swallows, feels his face heat up. 

A beat, and then Poe says, “I do trust you. I couldn’t,” he waves a hand, “do that to anyone else.”

“Good,” Finn says. He likes that he has this too, something else that Poe wants him to have. Sometimes he feels like he just takes and takes, that Poe wants to give him everything. He tries to do the same, let Poe have whatever he wants. He can have all of Finn if he wants it, he just has to ask. 

From the way Poe looks at him, the touch of his hands, the press of his lips, Finn thinks he knows.

the end 

**Author's Note:**

> so i'm thisissirius on twitter and wardolope on tumblr if you wanna come cry with me about poe and finn and rey. i'm all for that.


End file.
